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Copyright 2010 (3rd edition)

Note that italicised words indicate a reference to other Reach Potential entries, which can be found via the Handbook index.

Introduction
In the period of transition from the old world construction of reality to the New Earth, there will be much chaos at a human and planetary level. Old structures will fall away or need to be modified to align with the new Heart-centred consciousness. New more enlightened social structures will be dreamed and slowly developed. Your own life will already be reflecting these changes.

However, chaos is frightening and confusing. One of the most common responses to chaos is to get angry. Anger is a propellant energy: it catapults you into seeking a better way. For that point of view, anger can be a valuable indicator that it is time to take charge.

Unfortunately however most people do not know how to handle anger, even those who genuinely wish to create a more harmonious reality. The skill of owning, releasing and moving beyond anger is an essential skill for ensuring your own happiness and for those who wish to contribute their love to building the more joyful world we desire.
 
The nature of anger
Many people do not feel comfortable with anger because they have been taught, that it is unacceptable, or because they fear that it will get out of control and do severe damage to a relationship.

Even if you are an "angry" person the chances are you do not like yourself for it.

However, anger like every other emotion is a natural part of being human and has survival value. Anger targets something that needs to change or provides a person with a false sense of protection. It shows you something is wrong for you in your reality, even if by other people’s standards you have no ‘reason’ to be angry. You have a right to change that disturbance, but not through dumping anger.

Therefore the difficulty with anger is not that it exists but how you handle and use it.  Negatively, you can blow up, shut up or use it to invoke fear or to punish others. Positively, you can identify the problem, release the energy rush and then start to address the difficulty step by step in a grounded way.

Common dysfunctional responses
Earthdwellers and Skywalkers (see Handbook or Free Trial Article on Creative Personality Balance) tend to deal with anger in different ways.

•    Earthdwellers usually repress their anger; they try to be "reasonable". They feel they cannot get angry without justifiable basis in fact for their emotion. They hold back until they explode or it seeps out in martyred responses that create guilt trips in others.

•    Skywalkers either let loose, using anger to disguise other uncomfortable emotions, or withdraw from relationship altogether in order to avoid feeling the emotional discomfort of the anxiety that underlies their sense that they have no power to influence the other person to get their needs met.

•    If an individual of either style is unwilling to express anger, he or she will resort to sneaky ways of expressing it: passive aggression.

The involvement of the negative ego in anger
In all cases, the dysfunctional aspect of the anger response will be applauded by the negative ego (that part of you that prefers conflict, separation and competitiveness.) Your ego will justify the bad handling of anger with self-righteousness or denial.

•    If you are a Skywalker it may say that your anger explosions or withdrawal from relationship doesn't really do damage (untrue) or that without such behaviour you can have no positive impact (extremely untrue).

•    Earthdwellers’ negative ego will argue that an objection isn't really important enough to express (untrue) or that other people are too fragile to cope with a blunt but clean objection (untrue). The negative ego will claim that any direct expression will hurt the other party. It will encourage the Earth type to control anger in others by manipulating them.

The dangers of not handling anger appropriately
•    People of both personality types who repress the expression of their anger often do not recognise that they are experiencing it; they will tend to say they are frustrated, hurt, or sad. This means they can never clear the source of their distress.

•    Repressed anger leads to displacement. You will “kick the cat” instead of confronting the real problem. We call this dirty anger.

•    Anger that is continuously repressed or denied is liable to lead to become the stress basis for health problems, especially depression, but also stress-related disease such as heart problems.

•    Anger leads to a loss of motivation and productivity. Angry people lose motivation where once they were enthusiastic.

•    The overt abuse of anger is the source of extreme relationship pain and breakdown.

Techniques for releasing anger
Unlike most other emotions, anger cannot be released through inner work alone such as meditation, prayer or visualization. The physical body needs to be involved. You can use any body technique that is used specifically with the idea of releasing the stress from the body: dancing, stamping, gym work, yelling in private, or painting. If you use these techniques you must focus on where you feel the anger in the body as you release the feelings.

1. Shaking anger out
•    Start by learning how you feel anger by noticing what happens to your body when you remember a recent incident that made you angry. What part tenses or churns?

•    Now wait until a small incident occurs that makes you feel irritable, frustrated or grumpy.

•    Stand up and shake the feelings out of the entire body focusing on the area/s of the body where the anger is located. Do this vigorously and keep watching where the anger moves as you shake, Drop the anger downwards off the fingers and toes. Make sounds if that feels right.

•    Imagine that the anger energy is now located in front of you as a big ball at your feet. Pick up this ball and squash it together a little.

•    Throw the ball into the air, visualizing that it is flying into the universe of love and light.

•    Imagine the energy now being transformed into the energy you would prefer: e.g., peace, harmony, manifestation, or clarity etc.  Allow it to rain down on you. Absorb it.

•    Repeat this technique as you need it regularly. Do not wait until the anger is too powerful before clearing. The faster you clear anger the less damage it can do.

2. Hand writing anger letters
Writing out your anger is probably the most useful form of release if you need to communicate with someone later. You can use this in combination with physical methods.

Below is the basic technique to both explore and release anger. After writing an anger letter and burning it, you will feel centred and clear about what really concerns you. You may realize you are not so angry as frightened. You may decide that you need to discuss your objection or you may decide to let it go.

1. Hand write a letter to a person you are in conflict with. Even if you are angry with a whole crowd of people, identify the one you are most annoyed with. (You won’t ever send this!) In your letters express all the things you would like to say but don’t. Allow yourself to express your feelings colourfully.

2. Include the precise facts of how, when and why you are angry.

3. Write rapidly without pausing until you are done!

4. While you are writing, make sure you stay aware of body tension from time to time. Make a note of this: Example, “When I think of how you …. my jaw tightens and my stomach is in knots."

5. When you have completed the letter, put it aside in a secure place overnight or for at least four hours.

6. Read it over. Highlight the words and phrases that still have energy for you. Add extra details if necessary.

7. Now destroy the letter, preferably by burning it (safely). If this is not possible, tear it up and flush it down the toilet.

8. If you are unsure that your anger has released, try writing an anger letter to the same person three or four days later.

9. You may now wish to discuss the problem with the person concerned. Prepare for this communication carefully.

Identifying the objection
Your objection needs careful examination before you communicate it. Generally the superficial reason is not the real one, especially where you experience chronic anger around specific situations or people. After you have written your anger letter it is likely that you will become clearer about the true cause of your objections.

Example: If you are excessively angry that your neighbour has complained about your barking dog, this anger may seem unjustified to an outsider, but at a deeper level the distress is being caused by something else which is much more “reasonable” to you. It may be that the neighbour has always been unfriendly, that they are inconsiderate themselves, or that you are feeling controlled.

It is important to work out what is really happening. If you do not identify the underlying cause, you cannot address it directly and therefore all practical solutions will fall short of the mark. Reading your anger letter over the next day will often bring this deep feeling to the fore.

Other www.reachpotential.com.au information related to this subject:

The Handbook has extra information related to anger under the following categories

    * Anger
    * Acceptance
    * Blame
    * Depression
    * Forgiveness
    * Guilt
    * Inner child
    * Martyr
    * Negative ego
    * Projection
    * Wounds to consciousness